The Moment of Truth or Holy Crap What Have I done?


“Ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you mad.”  ~Aldous Huxley

I started this blog on a whim. This is absolutely untrue, of course, because I have been  writing, throwing my writing away, and dreaming of writing, since I was able to hold a pencil. Why do I want to pretend it’s just a silly thing I’ve given very little thought?

A whim by definition is:

1.A sudden desire or change of mind, esp. one that is unusual or unexplained.

2.A windlass for raising ore or water from a mine.

So the need to write is most definitely not sudden, a change of mind or unexplained. Judging by how many others are writing, the desire is not all that unusual either.

It does feel a little like raising ore from a mine. You know that it’s in there but sweet mother it’s not that easy to get it out is it?

So now all I need to do is to find a psychological windlass that will dredge my soul of all of the homeless characters and the sadistic need to tell a story so that it is out of the mine, much like the monster in Alien, and on to this screen.

As proof that my sadistic tendencies run deep I currently have 27 days to produce a minimum of 10 and a maximum of 20 pages fit to present to ten others in addition to a published author at week long class I am taking at the Fine Arts Work Center in Provincetown, Massachusetts.

Now, I signed up for this sucker on a whim, I can promise you that!!

The moment of truth has arrived. It’s now or never. Shit or get off the pot, as my dear mother was fond of saying.

The countdown begins. Any and all encouragement is appreciated and needed.

I never dreamed of being Shakespeare or Goethe, and I never expected to hold the great mirror of truth up before the world; I dreamed only of being a little pocket mirror, the sort that a woman can carry in her purse; one that reflects small blemishes, and some great beauties, when held close enough to the heart.  ~Peter Altenberg

About Magnolia Beginnings

Just when you think you have it all down it changes again or... “Reshaping life! People who can say that have never understood a thing about life—they have never felt its breath, its heartbeat—however much they have seen or done. They look on it as a lump of raw material that needs to be processed by them, to be ennobled by their touch. But life is never a material, a substance to be molded. If you want to know, life is the principle of self-renewal, it is constantly renewing and remaking and changing and transfiguring itself, it is infinitely beyond your or my obtuse theories about it.” ― Boris Pasternak, Doctor Zhivago

23 responses »

  1. I’m fond of that ol’ git off the pot myself! Yay you. YOU CAN and YOU WILL. You’ve more than proven you’ve got what it takes to re-make a life for yourself…now go out and GET HAPPY doing something you love!! That’s an order. Cheers Mo…hip hip and all that jazz. 🙂 xoxoxo

    • Thanks so much and ditto to you my friend. You seem to be setting a very nice example. Very excited but I feel like showing the inner workings of my head to people that can see me is a little like roller skating naked and God knows no on wants to see that!!

      • LOL…you may just be surprised! But I say…if they don’t? They can look in a different direction. This is YOUR time…so proud of you too. 🙂

  2. I remember the very first writing workshop I signed up for, when I found that passion to write inside of me, and the tears of frustration that flowed when we were asked to bring our latest work – I had no latest work or any work at the time! But somehow I found it in me to write something once I settled down, and the fear I felt melted away as the words came out. And I know once you can get to that quiet place your words will be there too – just brush that nasty little monkey of fear right off your back! You will be amazing…

  3. Inspiring. I love your drive. You can do it for sure.

    Yes, I’ve loved writing since I could hold a pencil too… touché. But I don’t have such a challenge before me, so huge good luck 🙂

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