How do you determine when you are asking for too much from another person? How much should you try to change in order to make a relationship work? When is it okay to accept less than you want or need without compromising beyond what you deserve? When is it just too much?
We all know there are things that we could improve upon. We could be more open, more accepting, more tolerant. Perhaps we need more patience or not to expect our partner to be “the world” to us.
But when do we stop trying to mold ourselves into another person’s idea of perfection and say “I am enough.” “I am enough with all of my faults, idiosyncrasies and peculiarities. I may not be perfect but I’m me, and if that’s not good enough, then it’s not me that you want. “
When do we look in the mirror and decide that changing certain things may be long over due and accepting another for who they are, whether it is or is not exactly enough, is worth the effort?
Where is the middle ground?
After all those years as a woman hearing ‘not thin enough, not pretty enough, not smart enough, not this enough, not that enough,’ almost overnight I woke up one morning and thought, ‘I’m enough.’
Damned Straight!! You are, I am, We are…Enough. More than…we are special because we are who we are. Love this xo
Oh it feels good to be loved again! xx
STILL girlie….STILL! xo
Huge hugs to you!
We PREFER our loved ones never hurt us, share our tastes and preferences, put us first, idolize us, compliment us, eliminate our pain, and make us happy. Sometimes they cannot and so, if we love them, we compromise. This is the middle ground
We TRUST loved ones never intentionally hurt, accept and value us for what we are, keep our best interests at heart, respect us, support us, care about us when in distress, and want us to be happy. If they cannot, it is not the middle ground, it is a crack in the foundation.
Great post and great to see you back 🙂
I just knew you’d hit that on the head. Great response and so good to hear from you. I hope you are well and life is good.
It is great to have you back. I missed you 🙂
Life for me is still tramping through a lot of mud (property settlement) but I am nearly there (thank goodness). The “me” part has grown and is doing OK. In some ways the process has made me discover the real me that was hidden for so many years in so many ways. That is the hidden joy from all the despair – finding me again.
Thanks for asking 🙂
Great post with big questions! Your wondering toward the end about worthiness reminded me of my favourite quote from Brene Brown:
“Worthy now. Not if, not when, we’re worthy of love and belonging now. Right this minute. As is.”
I like that. I like that a lot. Thanks for posting.
L- responded to your email but it came back. I tried again and I think it went through but let me know if you don’t get it. -M